Counting the Years

April 29, 2004, exactly 20 years ago, was a day that changed my life. That was the day I learned I had kidney cancer. The previous day I had blood in my urine that prompted me to have a sonogram. But the report wasn’t definitive and recommended further imaging. Still in the Philippines, I found a doctor the next morning who ordered a CT scan. The results showed a large tumor sitting on top of my left kidney.

Jan was already in the U.S. undergoing surgery for her melanoma cancer that had been discovered just a few weeks earlier. With my diagnosis, me and the 4 kids (David was already in the U.S. for his first year of college) had to pack up all our belongings and fly to the U.S. where I had surgery to remove my cancerous left kidney and 2 cancerous lymph nodes, which qualified me for stage 4. I declined treatment even though my life expectancy was now just a few years at best.

I’ve learned that anniversaries are a big deal for cancer survivors. Although my goal was never to live a long life, but rather to glorify God for however many days He gave me, I guess it’s still interesting to count the years. So, today marks 20 years that I’ve had stage 4 kidney cancer. Most of those years the cancer went into hiding after I had surgery in May of 2004, not making itself known again until the end of October, 2019, just before I returned to the Philippines. That was 4 and a half years ago.

Once I learned of my kidney cancer recurrence, I thought it would be nice if the Lord let me live until Christmas, 2020, when I could be with my family one last time. He’s now given me 4 Christmases. I also recall in early 2020 being disappointed that I wouldn’t get to see the April 8 solar eclipse. I was wrong. Three weeks ago, Hannah and I sat in the backyard of our Winona, Texas, house and watched in wonder as the moon totally blocked the sun for more than 2 minutes.

This week, the Lord allowed me to stick around long enough to visit with Martha and Philip who drove down from Richmond, Virginia, to spend a week with us. Last month they purchased a house in Richmond and are in the process of fixing it up. Philip continues to work in the training department of the IMB (Southern Baptist International Mission Board).

It’s totally up to the Lord how long He wants me to stick around. Recent indicators show that my cancer is taking its toll on my body. February was a difficult month for me. A cold turned into chest congestion which turned into pneumonia. It’s taken me until now to get over all of that. Recent blood work shows I’m anemic, a common effect of advanced cancer. I still have digestive issues because of my damaged pancreas. The protruding tumor on my left side often causes discomfort. I don’t see how I can make it to another Christmas, but that’s what I thought this time last year. We’ll see.

What hasn’t changed is the daily joy I find in the Lord and the peace I have in knowing my days are in His hands. I also thank the Lord regularly for the generous support and encouragement I receive from the IMB. There’s no better organization in the world to be a part of. They have gone far beyond what anyone would have expected in taking care of me. Being a missionary in the Philippines for 35 years was one of the greatest blessings of my life, and doing it as part of a great mission organization made it even more of a joyful experience.

The past 20 years have certainly been an amazing adventure. No, I will not make it another 20 years, that’s for sure. Even another Christmas is very doubtful. But my first 20 years in Heaven with the Lord will be the beginning of the best adventure of all!