Heaven's Gate

Well, I thought about giving an outlandish introduction for April Fools Day, but then decided against it. (For my Philippine readers, April 1 is April Fools Day in the U.S. when people often say crazy things or perform silly pranks.) So, instead, I'll share the following...

I was recently asked if I was angry at God for having cancer. I replied that, as Scripture explains, God chose me in Christ before the foundation of the world (Eph. 1:4), He sent His Son to pay the death-penalty I deserve, He has forgiven my sins, He rescued me from hell, He adopted me as His child, He has imparted to me His Holy Spirit, He has shared His wisdom, He has prepared a place in Heaven for me for eternity. How could I be angry? Cancer is my ticket out of this hell-bent world and into my home in Heaven. If anything, I am grateful for the cancer.

Of course, if I didn’t have cancer, I likely would still be in the Philippines doing what I could to make Christ known. But regardless of whatever momentary discomfort or pain cancer produces, “I do not lose heart. Although my body is dying, my inner spirit is being renewed day by day. For this momentary light affliction is preparing me for an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison” (2 Cor. 4: 16-17). As long as I stay focused on what is to come, and not on who I’m temporarily leaving behind, my heart is filled with joy.

Yet, I suppose it’s natural to focus on immediate concerns. Cancer doesn’t make it easy to leave this world. I mentioned last month that I made a visit to the ER which included a CT scan. It revealed the following:

Multiple tumors in both lungs. The largest is 73x51 mm, about the volume of a tennis ball, in my left lobe.

Multiple tumors in the liver. The largest is 56x44 mm, slightly larger than a ping-pong ball.

A tumor encases and constricts the renal artery leading to my right kidney. (Left kidney was surgically removed in 2004.)

A huge tumor completely surrounds my pancreas, 120x160 mm, that’s about the size of a large potato. This tumor also encases and constricts the inferior vena cava, the primary vein leading to the heart.

A tumor in my lower central abdominal area is pushing against and constricting my bowel loops.

There are tumors from my neck down my back, including one inside my lower spine.

These tumors would explain my lower back pain, my digestive and breathing difficulties, as well as other issues. With this much cancer, I just don’t see how my body can hold out much longer. For this reason, I want to use this opportunity to thank everyone, again, for praying for me and my family, and following me along in this cancer journey, as well as in our ministry through the years. The Lord has been generous to allow me to hang on this long. Even more generous, as unworthy as I am, by His mercy and grace, to have Heaven’s gate open and ready for me to enter. I’m excited to do so.

(Jude 1: 24-25) Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, and to make you stand in the presence of His glory blameless with great joy, to the only God our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion and authority, before all time, now and forever. Amen!