A World Away

I’ve been back in the States for a year now and may I confess something?  It doesn’t quite feel like home anymore.  Maybe it’s being surrounded by the materialistic American culture.  Maybe it’s the season of life that I’m in.   Maybe it’s the fact my kids are all grown now and building their own separate lives, which is a good thing and the way it should be.

But for whatever reason, I think I feel more like an alien and stranger in this world than I ever have in my life.  Again, that’s not a bad thing because, as Christians who “have eternity in our hearts” (Eccl. 3:11), who are to “set our minds on things above and not on things of the world” (Col. 3:2), we know God never intended for this earth to be our heaven.  However, as an introvert living overseas who has always enjoyed having a refuge to come home to, it’s been surprising to me that the U.S. doesn’t feel like a ‘refuge’ anymore.

Perhaps it’s the increasingly atheistic American society that weighs on me.  Thirty years ago when we came to the U.S. for furlough, mission emphasis in churches and associations were frequent and often a week long.  Now they are fewer and usually last only a day or two at most.  Then there’s the anti-Christian news media and Hollywood entertainment industry, the promotion of LGBT rights over religious freedom, the loss of our Christian heritage and moral values.  America, for me, is just no longer a pleasant place to live.

Not that the Philippines is any better.  Corruption is rampant, religious beliefs are shallow, and good moral values are also declining.  But historically, it seems God’s mercy and compassion has been greater towards those whose needs are more desperate.  The Philippines is among the lesser nations of the world and perhaps that’s why I feel a greater dependence on the Lord there and more fulfillment in working to extend the borders of His kingdom.  

For the past couple of months, we’ve been searching for an affordable house for Sara to live in.  I’ve found myself thinking more about mortgage rates, floor types, neighborhood environment, HVAC systems, foundation issues, rather than the extreme lostness that surrounds us both here and overseas.  I’ve had to chide myself, of all people, for my own short sightedness and lack of empathy for the things that matter most to the heart of God.

The Scripture speaks about the “weapons of our warfare” that we use “to fight the good fight of faith” against “the world forces of darkness” and the “god of this world who has blinded the minds of the unbelieving.”  Yet nearly all the prayers I hear in the church are for physical healing or material provisions.  In contrast, all of Paul’s prayers in the New Testament deal with his earnest plea that people would know Christ in a deeper and fuller way.

Certainly there is nothing wrong with “making our requests be made known to God”.  But I strongly suspect that God’s priorities are somewhat different than ours.  As John Piper says, “Prayer is a wartime walkie-talkie for spiritual warfare, not a domestic intercom to increase the comforts of the saints.”  I’ve grown as guilty as anyone for not keeping harmony with God’s priorities.  Perhaps that’s one reason why I’m eager to return to my ministry overseas.

But before I do, I have one more confession:  I’ve always had an over-sized enjoyment of God’s creation.  I’ve hiked in the mountains of Tennessee, Colorado, California, Washington, Wyoming, Montana, Alberta, the Philippines, and New Zealand.  Being in nature brings me close to the roots of my faith and thrills me like nothing else.  So, for 12 days in September, Hannah, Daniel, and I will hike the mighty hills of Switzerland and enjoy the majestic Alps.  It will be a dream come true and a fine ending to my “stateside assignment”.  Though we live in a fallen world, there are still people and places on this earth where we can experience glimpses of God's glory.