Body Wash

I’m glad more people don’t read this blog spot. I would be awfully embarrassed with what I’m about to share. But I can’t help it. You’ve had the experience, haven’t you, of walking through a mall and suddenly you pass someone who smells like they just bathed in a river of cologne, or washed their hair with some exotic perfume.

Well, for some time now, my subconscious has been registering all these ads for men’s body wash. I’d seen it on the shelves of the pharmacy, but I didn’t know what it was, much less how to use it. Last week, my conscience grabbed hold of a thought, “Why don’t you see what that stuff is?”

So I did. But you have to understand my disdain for cosmetics. Last month, Hannah asked me one day, “Dad, where is your soap?” I replied, “Oh, I don’t use soap.”

“What! Here in the tropics! You don’t use… Then how do you…?

“Well, my dear, every time I take a bath I wash my hair, and there’s always enough suds left over to wash the rest of me. You know how I like efficiency and saving money.” Hannah just shook her head and sighed. But then I thought how sad that, there in the corner of my shower, stood my lonely 99 cent shampoo bottle with no one in the soap dish to talk to. Of course, Jan never complained about how I smelled. On the other hand, maybe that’s why she went to heaven!

Anyway, for me to expand my collection of cosmetics to include body wash was quite a splurge. Maybe it’s a mid-life (or late life) crisis or something, but I looked up the most highly rated body washes. (I wonder who rates this kind of stuff.) Then I went to the mall and bought one – a heavily scented and expensive one. The next morning I lavished it on. After I was cleaned up, I took my newly scented body back to the mall to test the results.

My, oh my, did the ladies’ heads turn! One lady moaned, “Mmmmmm,” as she passed my windward side. I got a lot more smiles than usual. I think the body wash may have even raised my testosterone levels. Back home, even our dog, a female, sneezed more when near me.

I don’t know if body wash will take a permanent place on my bathroom shelf. Probably not. But if I ever want to get people’s favorable attention, now I know how to do it.

Notes: Yesterday (the 12th) was Martha’s 16th birthday. Early in the morning, she went with me to the beach where I baptized 2 college students. In the evening, we had a father-daughter dinner date at a nice Italian restaurant. I’m very proud of the godly woman God is making her to be.

Do you remember the old Sammy Davis Jr. song The Candy Man? Well, with all the political changes in the air, I think you might smile at Tim Hawkins latest video. You can also go to YouTube and search for: Tim Hawkins Government. Tim is a Christian and was home schooled. I think you’ll enjoy his other YouTube clips, too.